Youre my feet when i cant move on

20050322

Jesus. hold my hand. and guide me.

i reeli dunt kno how to describe ma emotions fer today. i mean. i got my posting out alr. and , it wos unsuccessful. not that im expecting it. but i expected lyke gettin into one course of my 12 choices ? so. sighs. in a delima again. and this tym. i feel myself being emotionally stronger. yet tighter in my feelins.
retail's management COP 16. considerin its a new course . im quite shocked that its so low. oh well. so , obviously i didnt get in. debster got into her biz , im reeli very happy fer her. she said this which reeli moved me. " i feel very sad even tho i got into my course, seeing u all nv get in to where u all want". i mean , to me. tho its jes a sentence but. it moved me. some of my friends got into wot they reeli want or at least get into somewhere decent and it seem to be that their world are fallin apart worst than mine. i seriously dunt understand why. God , let me have compassion fer them. i mean. i have NO where to go. and , i strongly wanna do my O's again. but the pple around me jes dunt encourage that. i guess , i shud listen to where God wants me to go and do. eaither retake or try appealin into engineering or IT courses.
and the worst thing is , my parents are in china at this crucial moment. still , they called and asked me wot are my plans. i thank God fer supportive parents. they reeli believed in me. thanks daddy and mum. (: i love u.
y'kno. we , as human beins have NUTHIN to offer to God. we have fallen because of our fallen nature. and , its lyke. i feel. i shudnt hold on to my lyfe so tightly. jes let go and let God handle my lyfe. ive learnt so much. i guess its all in God's plan. ive learnt a lesson. and i will never ever repeat it ever again.
seems lyke jns' out fer re-doin it. friends , i reeli hopoe that u can support my decision. i want a second chance. and i want to glorify the Lord wiv my next results. reeli.

and thanks as well fer pple who have been loving me all the way. thanks fer ya encouragements. to sihui , is ok. move on. i love u girl. and y'kno - God is mouldin us jes lyke a potter. u will do well wherever u go. pray. be wise. seek God first. he will guide u kays. and to debbie. i love u. u are indeed my inspiration at tyms. weird huh ? and to ade , kelv , daph , jess , cay , lest , ben and huizhen. thank you so so much.

love.

11:23 PM